Tag: Desert Bus

Desert Bus, Act 6

Courtesy LoadingReadyRun

(With apologies to William Shakespeare)

To bus, or not to bus. That is the question —
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous tedium,
Or to take arms against a sea of terrible games,
And, by opposing, end them? To quit, to sleep—
No more — and by a sleep to say we end
The heartache and the thousand spattered bugs
That game is heir to — ’tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished! To quit, to sleep.
To sleep, perchance to dream — ay, there’s the rub,
For in that sleep of quitting what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this Sega CD,
Must give us pause. There’s the respect
That makes calamity of so long a marathon.
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
Th’ highway’s length, the wheel’s necess’ry justments,
The pangs of despised hours, the end’s delay,
The insolence of comments, and the spurns
That patient merit of th’ others take,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a pulled plug? Who would travels bear,
To grunt and sweat with a sweaty gamepad,
But that the dread of never helping children,
The undispensed charity from whose bosom
No comfort issues, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those roads we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus the Moonbase does make donors of us all,
And thus the loading bars of livestreams
Give way unto the pale cast of the room,
And an enterprise of great pith and moment
With this regard makes ready our captive eyes,
As once again, we run to Vegas.

Or, you know, back to Tuscon. Depending on what hour it is.

Loading Ready Run‘s Desert Bus begins tomorrow.

The Desert Bus Cometh

Courtesy Loading Ready Run

(With apologies to Lewis Carroll)

The time has come, (the Alchemist said)
To talk of many things:
Of busses — and cards — and handmade-crafts
Of children and of kings.

Once a year they gather there,
A fanciful base on the moon –
(Granted, we know it’s actually Canada,
but don’t spoil it so soon!)

They sit upon their bean-bags and couches,
Displayed for all of us,
For that great and humble event we love,
The one called Desert Bus.

From Tuscon to Las Vegas is their digitized route,
Displayed on Sega CD.
Since Penn & Teller decided (for the lulz)
To make a non-violent game, you see:

There are no bullets, no cars, no rockets,
No prostitutes or pimps.
Just drive and drive and drive some more,
Until you weep like simps.

“What purpose?” you ask? “What’s wrong with them?
“Why do they do these vids?”
The answer’s as simple as it is heart-warming:
They do it for the kids.

As long as donations and auctions abound,
The crew will play the game.
Could be for days or weeks or more,
To them it’s all the same.

They’ll sell hand-stitched crafts of all kinds,
Things mythic and beyond,
They’ll laugh, they’ll cry, they’ll drink Red Bull,
And with us they will bond.

Watch and donate, for the children,
for the auctions and the fun.
Brave as they are, they can’t do it alone,
That crew from Loading Ready Run.

Here it comes now! I hope you’re ready!
There’s room for all of us.
Join us, won’t you? The time has come
to ride the Desert Bus.

There Goes That Desert Bus

Courtesy Loading Ready Run

It’s that time again, folks.

The fine Canadian comedians of Loading Ready Run have taken to the road once more. In a manner of speaking. The 4th Annual Desert Bus For Hope, I believe subtitled “A New Hope”, is underway. They’ve already been playing the world’s most boring video game for 9 hours as of this writing.

For those of you who don’t know, this annual event is similar to the Extra Life challenge, in that intrepid gamers take on a marathon session for charity. Desert Bus, however, lasts much longer than 24 hours. It lasts as long as the donations do. And the crew at Loading Ready Run play only one game: Desert Bus, an unreleased game on Sega CD that was part of Penn & Teller’s Smoke & Mirrors. You drive a bus from Tuscon to Las Vegas. There’s no traffic, very little scenery and the bus occasionally veers a bit to the right, so you can’t tape down a button to do something else in order to complete the journey.

Sound like fun? It isn’t.

Last year they raised over $140,000 for the Child’s Play charity, which benefits children’s hospitals with donations of toys, games, books and cash. This year I’d love to see them break the $200,000 mark. That means they’d be playing Desert Bus for at least a week straight.

Visit their site or the special feature over at the Escapist. Give what you can. Check out the things they do to amuse themselves while they play this tedious excuse for a video game. There are auctions, special guests and more than a few surprises.

And remember, it’s for the children.

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